This morning was like any other.
Marmie’s alarm went off.
I leapt out of bed.
Marmie let me sit in the sink while she drew on her face.
Marmie fed me dry food.
Marmie scooped the poo from my litterbox.
Marmie let me scratch her couch.
Marmie gave me deets.
As I was sitting there, soaking up the heat of the laptop, I thought–
I really am lucky to have such a kind Marmie.
And in that moment, I decided I should do something nice for her.
Perhaps bring her a present?
And dropped it where she couldn’t miss it.
That’s right! I brought Marmie my most beloved possession.
I really can be such a sweet fella.
The thing is—she didn’t appreciate Mouse like I thought she would.
In fact, she called it ‘gross’ and threw it away.
THREW MOUSE AWAY!
Don’t worry, I guilted her into giving it back. But she insisted on washing it first!
Months worth of cat spit, gone.
Months worth of collected floor dust, gone.
All because I wanted to be nice.
That’s the last time Marmie will get a gift from me.